I remember the day she said "no".
I had offered everything I had.
My body, my soul,
my self esteem.
Everything.
And as I stood there
weak, open and vulnerable,
she said "no".
She had been good to me.
Smiled smiles
I thoughts were only for me.
I remember her first kiss,
and the first time we made love.
But at that one second
I understood.
All those moments were worth nothing.
I was worth nothing.
May be she had just played with me
for fun and frolic.
May be I was not man enough for her.
But what do I tell myself?
How do I heal the bloody wound
she gave me
when she said "no"?
I have cried,
nay, yelled without sound;
yelled in anguish.
But the wound till this day remains
and festers all the time.
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