Some wicked people say I don't have the brains for anything else except body building and flexing them while I get filmed; these being my films. What rubbish! I do a lot other things too. I line-maro beautiful women. I seduce them first and then I slap them around. People say I am a MCP. Rubbish! You got to slap women when they don't behave, isn't it? What is all that male-chauvinistic-pig stuff about that?
I love my women. In fact I love them even after they get married, to some else. Take the case of Aishwarya Rai. I still love her and so naturally I keep reminiscing about her. How I made @&# with her and how many times. Katrina does not like that. But she does not say anything now after I slapped her. Nothing wrong in not forgetting your lady loves, eh? That is true love. katrina samajti nahin hai.
I love Katrina too. That is why I don't want her to act with that cheap guy, Shahrukh Khan. The cheek of the girl! She wanted to act with Shahrukh in a Yash Raj film! I will not allow that.
So I slyly invited that %$#@! to the birthday party of Katrina and picked a fight with him. I taunted him. I am quite a bully, you know. That !@#%$ was not getting provoked so I taunted him more, till he got angry. Somebody stopped me otherwise I would have loved to beat him up.
After all I am the real Khan. Two nights later, I did go up to his house and yelled at him to come out of the house. Some presswallahs say I abused his wife and kids too. Bullshit! I only abused that %$#@!.
I am not a bad guy. Do you read the columns that my lackeys write? You will know that I have a big heart and help out people. I am a good boy.
Anyway why am wasting my time in blabbering all this in my mind? I should go to the gym and work out some more. It is a bad world and one has to be strong. I have to build my biceps and triceps some more. My producers say that is the reason why I am in Bollywood.
